No Little Things, No Big Future.

I can’t tell you how many times I asked him to take me out. I meant date me. Make me feel wanted. Show me you still see me as the girl you fell for.

But one day, he literally said, “We don’t need dates.”

And maybe he thought our circumstances gave him an out. Sure, maybe physical dates weren’t possible at the time, I get that. But romance isn’t limited to restaurant reservations and movie tickets.

Pretty picnic basket in a backyard with a cheese plate and water glasses

He could’ve planned a video call dinner where we both ordered our favorite takeout. He could’ve mailed me a little note or done something small that said, “I’m thinking of you.”He could’ve said, “Friday night, I’m all yours,” and been all mine, no distractions, no half-texting while doing something else. I know even this is hard when you don’t have your own space and you’re living in a house full of people.

Dating is about intention. It’s the choice to keep showing up for each other, even when life doesn’t make it easy.

When he said we didn’t need dates, what I heard was, “We don’t need effort.” And that’s when my heart started packing its bags.

You wanted me to let you lead. You wanted me to submit to you, letting you make all the decisions. But you skipped the little things. Yeah, the “I love you” a million times a day was sweet, but that was just the bare minimum.

Pink floral suitcase

Then there are the constant reminders that I needed to “work on myself,” that you were the better person, while I was already halfway out the door. But I tried to stay because I knew what kind of man you could’ve been.

So don’t act surprised when I handle things myself. Don’t look shocked when I figure it out on my own.

Yeah, maybe I should’ve given you more opportunities, but dang, if you can’t do the little things, how am I supposed to hand you the big ones?

And yes, I knew I didn’t love you the way you wanted, but I loved you the way I knew, and it was wrong, apparently. Love only works when it’s tended to.

"Let all that you do be done in love." — 1 Corinthians 16:14